10 May 2019
Find Your Tribe: How to create lasting, loving relationships
Other than a well thought out, stressless morning routine – if you ask a successful person how they found success they will tell you that they didn’t do it alone. They have other people around them that are there for support, encouragement, ideas, friendship, love and kindness.
Building a strong network of powerful, supportive friends is the key to lasting success. These are people who have your back, who you can put forth ideas and who will tell you the truth when you need it.
But how do you go about creating and maintaining loving relationships like this?
Read on to get the inspiration!
Open up your heart:
When you think about it, there are casual acquaintances in your life, who you could reach out and have a coffee with. People who maybe you think it would be awkward to hang out with? Or ask out for a coffee? – Maybe you don’t know what you would talk about. But these are people who you have gelled with in the past and have a connection with. Don’t be afraid. Fear holds us back, because the universe is testing you to see how much you want these changes. Ask yourself do you actually want the new friend? Do you actually want this friendship to be stronger? Your first step is to open your heart to the possibility of these friendships blossoming.
Club, events, functions and classes:
It’s time to start saying yes to the things you get invited to. Don’t worry about going alone to see your friends/close acquaintance’s band play, or going to that birthday party where you only know one person, or going alone to that gallery opening. Take the chance, and if you don’t meet anyone you have spent a well deserved night taking yourself on a date. (There’s no shame in that! You get bonus points for practicing self-love.)
If events and gallery openings aren’t really your thing, Volunteering can be a great way to help others while also meeting new people. Volunteering also gives you the opportunity to regularly practice and develop your social skills. Find something you are interested in, or want to help with. There are always organisations that are in need, homeless shelters, salvation army, red cross, or an animal shelter, event assistants etc. The great part of volunteering is that your actions make an obvious difference and impact the lives around you.
Another great way to meet people is to take a class or join a club to meet people with common interests. Have a look at casual short courses at your local Tafe to see if there is something you’re interested in, – whether it’s life drawing, ceramics or learning a new language. Taking a class ensures that the people learning with you have at least one interest in common. Check public notice boards for local groups, such as book or dinner clubs and sports teams.
Invite a neighbour or work colleague out for a drink or to a movie. Lots of other people feel just as uncomfortable about reaching out and making new friends as you do. Be the one to break the ice, even if its just to say “We should go for after work drinks to deal with this day!” Who knows they may say yes, and in no time a friendship that goes beyond work politics could blossom!
Connect with your alumni association. Many colleges have alumni associations that meet regularly. You already have the college experience in common; talking about old times can be an easy conversation starter. Some associations also sponsor community service events or workshops where you can meet more people. Check with your university to see if they have an alumni email list you can get on. When they hold events, make sure to go.
Track down old friends via social media sites. Make the effort to reconnect and then turn your “online” friends into “real-world” friends by meeting up for coffee instead of chatting on Facebook or Twitter. Have a look to see what events they have said they are going to attend, reach out and ask to meet up or go with them!
Social media is a great way to connect to old childhood friends and people you went to primary school with. Strike up a conversation and see where it goes.
“Who does not thank for little will not thank for much.” – Estonian Proverb.
One of the most powerful things you can do to keep a relationship going strong or kindle a friendship that’s just starting, is to give thanks. Make it a daily habit, to send 5 ‘thank you’s’ to the people around you. Even if it’s just a quick text, or note saying “hey love you, thanks for being you.”
Don’t worry if they haven’t done anything special lately, just send out love for them being there.
If you think you will struggle to give out 5 thank yous – think out of the box! Thank your barista when you get your coffee on the way to work. Thank the check out chic for her help loading your groceries. Thank the chef, your cat and your partner. When you start doing this you begin a system of being grateful for the small things around you. Practicing gratitude in this way will help you create an awareness of how good life is and how blessed you are. All this while at the same time, it makes others feel good about themselves, and you want to be the kind of person who makes others feel good.
Besides the more you give, the more you will receive.
Want other ways to foster self love and good feelings?
Click here for our ways to build self-esteem!
Or click here to see our top positive affirmations.