By Chelsea Ross
Learning to let go and experiencing the loss of some one is one of life’s great initiations. It arrives like the tide, pulling away what once felt solid beneath your feet, leaving you standing on unfamiliar ground. Whether you are grieving the passing of a beloved soul or mourning the departure of someone who once walked beside you, know this: grief is not a sign of weakness, nor is it something to be conquered. It is a passage, a sacred unfolding.
The ancient teachings of the Yogic path and the wisdom of the Goddess remind us that impermanence is woven into the very fabric of existence. Everything that is born will one day dissolve. But just as the setting sun does not erase the light, love does not end when a form is lost. Love transforms. Love moves like breath—unseen, but always present.
I offer you these seven ways to walk your path when grief comes to meet you, to hold it as both teacher and companion. There is no rush, no right way. There is only your heart, and the wisdom it already carries.
1. Release the Timeline of Grief
We live in a world that urges us to move quickly—to fix, to heal, to return to “normal.” But grief is not something to be rushed. It moves in cycles, like the phases of the moon, appearing full one moment and barely visible the next.
In Patanjali’s Yoga Sutras, we are reminded of the practice of svadhyaya—self-study. This is the art of witnessing ourselves without judgment. Can you allow your grief to unfold naturally, without expectation? Some days, it will be a whisper; other days, a storm. Both are holy. Give yourself permission to be exactly where you are.
2. Hold Gratitude for the Time You Had
Out of all the souls who have walked this earth, you and your beloved found one another. Pause for a moment and take that in. The odds were infinite, and yet, your lives intertwined.
Yes, the loss is real. Yes, the ache is deep. But let gratitude walk beside the sorrow. Can you close your eyes and feel the warmth of their presence, even now? Can you let the love you shared be bigger than the pain of their absence? Gratitude does not erase grief, but it allows you to carry it with more tenderness, more grace.
3. Be With Your Emotions Without Becoming Them
In Buddhist practice, there is a teaching called shoshin, or “beginner’s mind.” It is the practice of seeing each moment with fresh eyes, without attachment, without resistance. Can you sit with your grief in this way?
Instead of pushing it away or drowning in it, can you simply observe it? Notice where it lives in your body. Feel the way it moves, the way it shifts. Let it pass through you like a wave, knowing that you are the vast ocean beneath it. You are not your grief. You are the one witnessing it, the one holding space for its rise and fall. And over time, it will change. It always does.
4. Let Life Be Beautiful Again
There is a Zen teaching that says, “Before enlightenment, chop wood, carry water. After enlightenment, chop wood, carry water.” Life does not stop when we grieve. The wind still moves through the trees, the rivers still flow, the sun still rises. And one day, without force or effort, you will find yourself laughing again.
At first, it may feel like a betrayal. But beloved, joy does not dishonor grief—it honors life. The Goddess does not ask you to stay in shadow forever. She asks you to feel it fully, and then, when the time is right, to step back into the light. Let beauty find you again. A flower blooming in the cracks of the pavement. A song drifting through the air. The warmth of a cup of tea in your hands. Life continues, and it is waiting to welcome you back.
5. Embody Their Light
There is a Sanskrit word, smarana, which means both “remembering” and “calling forth.” When we lose someone, their presence in this world shifts, but it does not vanish. Their essence lives on in the way they moved through life, in the love they shared. And now, dear one, you have the power to carry that forward.
Were they kind? Be kind. Did they create beauty? Create beauty. Did they uplift others? Let their spirit move through your hands, your words, your choices. This is not about replacing them; it is about allowing their gifts to continue through you. The Bhagavad Gita reminds us that we are never truly separate from those we love—our souls are interwoven beyond time.
6. Know That They Would Want You to Thrive
Love does not wish suffering upon those it leaves behind. The one you lost—whether through death or through the unfolding of life’s path—would not want you to stay frozen in pain. They would want to see you rise. To see you create, explore, love, and expand.
One of the great truths of the yogic path is dharma—our sacred purpose. Your journey is not over. There are still places to go, lessons to learn, joys to experience. Honor them by living fully. Let their love be the wind at your back, the whisper that reminds you to keep moving forward.
7. Look Around—You Are Still Surrounded by Love
Grief has a way of narrowing our vision, making us see only what we have lost. But widen your gaze, dear one. Love is still here. It is in the eyes of those who remain. In the breath that moves through your body. In the earth beneath your feet, holding you even now.
Yes, something has changed. But not everything is gone. Open your heart to what remains. To the hands that still reach for you. To the voices that still call your name. To the love that continues, in ways both seen and unseen.
Take your time. Let each step be a prayer, each breath a renewal. You do not need to force healing. Simply trust that, like the cycles of the moon, like the turning of the seasons, it will come.
One day, you will wake up, and the grief will not be gone, but it will have softened. One day, you will speak their name, and it will bring more love than pain. One day, you will look at your life and see not just loss, but all that still remains.
And when that day comes, know this: they are still with you. They always have been and you are not alone.
